I GOT A JOB

I GOT A JOB. I START NEXT MONDAY. 


I guess that's it for gainful unemployment! Stay tuned for my forthcoming book about the worst 10 months of my young life. 

SECOND ROUND!

WHO GOT A SECOND ROUND INTERVIEW FOR LUCKY #13?

I DID I DID I DID.

I AM NOT A HORRIBLE FAILURE.

DON'T LET ME SCREW UP.

OHMYGOSH WHY AM I WRITING IN ALL CAPS?!!!

another week

Huh, well, another week has gone by, and I haven't heard back from the last two interviews. It's gut-wrenching waiting around. I've already followed up a few times, so I think any more might be annoying. Is it annoying? Does anyone know? Will persistence ultimately spell my ruin?

Wow, I have been reading way too many novels lately, though an article I recently read showed that those who read fiction tend to be more empathetic and understanding. Everyone could really benefit from reading more novels, in my opinion.

waiting waiting waiting

All of this waiting to hear back is giving me a serious case of insomnia. This is like senior year of high school only so much worse because there's no guarantee that I'll be doing anything at all for the rest of eternity.

I can't sleep past 5 anymore, and when I wake up I think about how wretched the state of life is right now. And then I condemn myself for thinking like that because it could be so much worse. I think in this case it would be better if I were just stupid and selfish all the time so that I couldn't give rattle my brain with cognitive dissonance.

#13

So I made it to thirteen interviews. Yesterday was the thirteenth one and I don't think it was jinxed, in spite of popular belief.

The interview was in NYC, so I had to once again commute about an hour and a half to find the place, which was located near Union Square. I really dig the vibe around Union Square, which is good. So many hipsters running about.

The interview itself wasn't terrible, though I noticed I made a type-o on my resume. Crap. Apparently I am in denial about the turning of the year because I listed the end of my internship as February 2011 rather than February 2012. Bah. Denial.

Interview #12

It looks like I forgot to actually document what happened at interview #12. Let me do that now for your reading pleasure.

I drove to the company's office in suburban New Jersey, just about half an hour from my home. I entered the hotel-scented lobby, rode the rickety elevator to the third floor and found the reception area of the office. Once inside, I was greeted by the HR lady with whom I was in contact. Also, I should note that I only got this interview because of a family friend who recommended me. That was nice of her, see -- the power of networking at work right here!

The company had grown from its founding in 1997 and now opened offices across the country and internationally. We walked back down to the lower level, where the HR offices were located and I found myself in a spacious conference room with windows overlooking a parking lot. Oh, what a view.

I seated myself, and the HR lady asked me to fill out an application for employment. Really, now? Another application? It's bad enough filling them out online. Now I actually had to put pen to paper and rehash the contents of my resume on this four-page form. I was not pleased.

the walkabout

Because of today's anomalous weather, I decided to leave the house for once and face real people. Yes, I braved the gritty suburban streets and took a mid-afternoon stroll after my lunch of peanut butter toast with a banana.

It was a beautiful day, and on my walk, I found the neighborhood surprisingly busy. Stay-at-home moms were cruising the streets, some youths were around for unexplained reasons, and then there were the retirees. Yes, my neighborhood has always been fairly geriatric, but only today did I realize just how much everyone aged in my four-year-absence at school. It's amazing how much has changed.

I walked up a steep hill I'd never climbed before, just to see where it would lead and I saw an elderly woman checking her mail. I had just reached the end of the sidewalk and turned around when she waved me over.

"Are you new here?" she asked. Oh gosh, she thought I was new here?

"No, no," I said. "I just live down there." I pointed to a place somewhere downhill, just in case she was crazy or something.

lucky number 12?

Tomorrow will be my twelfth interview in the past year. Wow, I can't believe I've been interviewing for a year. By this time I should be a total pro.

I am actually quite convinced that I am pro. It's just that people a) don't want to pay me what I'm worth, b) they don't understand just how awesome I am upon meeting me, or c) suck.

on the continued hunt

This is why I hate leaving my house these days: shame. When I go to the grocery store (or any other place in my small hometown),  people who may have known me in the past invariably ask me one thing:

"Hey, how's the job hunt going?"

This is what I want to say: "Pretty awful, considering I'm here in the grocery store in the middle of the day with  my mom. If I were successful, I would be working right now and not running up and down the aisles looking for cumin." I mostly blame my mother who has established herself as a minor celebrity here. Going to the grocery store tacks on an additional half an hour to what would have been an ordinary supply run.

What I actually say: "Well...not so great." I refuse to give them the satisfaction of knowing that I have failed. Me, failing. It's so improbable. It's the curse of the valedictorians -- trust me, there have been studies that show that valedictorians tend to be slightly less successful because of their low propensity to take the risks required for great success.