They may not be so elusive in some circles, but among my friends they were a veritable mystery, a myth sparked by that song that mentions "apple bottom jeans, boots with the fur." What's it called? "Get Low," I believe.
Just about three years ago, I worked at the information desk in my local mall. The stories about that experience about, but this one day in particular, a guy wearing a bandana and a grungy t-shirt moseyed on up to the desk.
"Hello," he said. "Where can I find apple bottom jeans?"
Apple bottom jeans, I thought, those are real?? I thought they were just some made-up kind of clothing. I didn't know people actually wore them! Or actually sought them out!
"Apple bottom jeans? What are those?" I said, going through all the possible meanings of apple bottom jeans in my head. Were they jeans with apples on the bottom? Or were they jeans that made your butt look like an apple?
"I'm not sure exactly. They're a brand, I think," he said. "My girlfriend wants them. She said to try d.e.m.o."
I pointed him in the direction of the d.e.m.o. store. I had never actually been inside, and now I'll never have the chance to since it went out of business.
I suppose I could have just googled "apple bottom jeans" that time to figure out once and for all what they were, but I guess I didn't care enough...
That is until I spotted them on this woman in the Port Authority!
There I was, heading towards the escalator, when I saw the word "bottom" embroidered in large cursive across one cheek of this woman's ample behind. That's odd, I thought, why would you want to identify your bottom in such a conspicuous way? Mind you, her bottom was already very easily identifiable.
Then I noticed that the outline of an embroidered apple was also visible on her behind. It finally clicked. Apple. Bottom. Jeans.
She wasn't wearing boots with the fur, for the record.
Anyway, I'm really glad I've finally seen apple bottom jeans in action because I've been wondering about them for all this time.
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