I GOT A JOB

I GOT A JOB. I START NEXT MONDAY. 


I guess that's it for gainful unemployment! Stay tuned for my forthcoming book about the worst 10 months of my young life. 

SECOND ROUND!

WHO GOT A SECOND ROUND INTERVIEW FOR LUCKY #13?

I DID I DID I DID.

I AM NOT A HORRIBLE FAILURE.

DON'T LET ME SCREW UP.

OHMYGOSH WHY AM I WRITING IN ALL CAPS?!!!

another week

Huh, well, another week has gone by, and I haven't heard back from the last two interviews. It's gut-wrenching waiting around. I've already followed up a few times, so I think any more might be annoying. Is it annoying? Does anyone know? Will persistence ultimately spell my ruin?

Wow, I have been reading way too many novels lately, though an article I recently read showed that those who read fiction tend to be more empathetic and understanding. Everyone could really benefit from reading more novels, in my opinion.

waiting waiting waiting

All of this waiting to hear back is giving me a serious case of insomnia. This is like senior year of high school only so much worse because there's no guarantee that I'll be doing anything at all for the rest of eternity.

I can't sleep past 5 anymore, and when I wake up I think about how wretched the state of life is right now. And then I condemn myself for thinking like that because it could be so much worse. I think in this case it would be better if I were just stupid and selfish all the time so that I couldn't give rattle my brain with cognitive dissonance.

#13

So I made it to thirteen interviews. Yesterday was the thirteenth one and I don't think it was jinxed, in spite of popular belief.

The interview was in NYC, so I had to once again commute about an hour and a half to find the place, which was located near Union Square. I really dig the vibe around Union Square, which is good. So many hipsters running about.

The interview itself wasn't terrible, though I noticed I made a type-o on my resume. Crap. Apparently I am in denial about the turning of the year because I listed the end of my internship as February 2011 rather than February 2012. Bah. Denial.

Interview #12

It looks like I forgot to actually document what happened at interview #12. Let me do that now for your reading pleasure.

I drove to the company's office in suburban New Jersey, just about half an hour from my home. I entered the hotel-scented lobby, rode the rickety elevator to the third floor and found the reception area of the office. Once inside, I was greeted by the HR lady with whom I was in contact. Also, I should note that I only got this interview because of a family friend who recommended me. That was nice of her, see -- the power of networking at work right here!

The company had grown from its founding in 1997 and now opened offices across the country and internationally. We walked back down to the lower level, where the HR offices were located and I found myself in a spacious conference room with windows overlooking a parking lot. Oh, what a view.

I seated myself, and the HR lady asked me to fill out an application for employment. Really, now? Another application? It's bad enough filling them out online. Now I actually had to put pen to paper and rehash the contents of my resume on this four-page form. I was not pleased.

the walkabout

Because of today's anomalous weather, I decided to leave the house for once and face real people. Yes, I braved the gritty suburban streets and took a mid-afternoon stroll after my lunch of peanut butter toast with a banana.

It was a beautiful day, and on my walk, I found the neighborhood surprisingly busy. Stay-at-home moms were cruising the streets, some youths were around for unexplained reasons, and then there were the retirees. Yes, my neighborhood has always been fairly geriatric, but only today did I realize just how much everyone aged in my four-year-absence at school. It's amazing how much has changed.

I walked up a steep hill I'd never climbed before, just to see where it would lead and I saw an elderly woman checking her mail. I had just reached the end of the sidewalk and turned around when she waved me over.

"Are you new here?" she asked. Oh gosh, she thought I was new here?

"No, no," I said. "I just live down there." I pointed to a place somewhere downhill, just in case she was crazy or something.

lucky number 12?

Tomorrow will be my twelfth interview in the past year. Wow, I can't believe I've been interviewing for a year. By this time I should be a total pro.

I am actually quite convinced that I am pro. It's just that people a) don't want to pay me what I'm worth, b) they don't understand just how awesome I am upon meeting me, or c) suck.

on the continued hunt

This is why I hate leaving my house these days: shame. When I go to the grocery store (or any other place in my small hometown),  people who may have known me in the past invariably ask me one thing:

"Hey, how's the job hunt going?"

This is what I want to say: "Pretty awful, considering I'm here in the grocery store in the middle of the day with  my mom. If I were successful, I would be working right now and not running up and down the aisles looking for cumin." I mostly blame my mother who has established herself as a minor celebrity here. Going to the grocery store tacks on an additional half an hour to what would have been an ordinary supply run.

What I actually say: "Well...not so great." I refuse to give them the satisfaction of knowing that I have failed. Me, failing. It's so improbable. It's the curse of the valedictorians -- trust me, there have been studies that show that valedictorians tend to be slightly less successful because of their low propensity to take the risks required for great success.

back to the beginning

Well, it appears I screwed up interview #11 in spite of my best efforts. I'm back to the start. No prospects. No  interviews lined up.

It's weird because this interview actually went well. I even wanted this job. I had real reason to be there. There were two case interviews along with a resume walk-through, followed by a writing exercise.

Here are some possible reasons why I didn't get the job:

1. Humoring me. I only got the initial phone interview because of an email I sent to a previous recruiter for a different position. Maybe they never intended to hire me at all, but just wanted to give me a good impression of the company as a whole? Still, that would have cost them probably around $500 total for my interview. They did pay for it, luckily, so I got a good trip to D.C. out of the whole ordeal.

2. School snobbery. Okay, my school wasn't "top-tier," but it's pretty darn good. Is it my fault that the Ivies didn't want me? I was valedictorian, dude. I think the reason I didn't get into the Ivies was that I followed the "formula" that the guidance department prescribed to a tee. I studied my butt off, participated in a bunch of clubs, held leadership positions, did community service. Dang, I was a beast in high school.

#11

Interview #11 wasn't as terrible as I thought it would be. Yeah, they actually gave reasonable case studies, rather than the idiotic questions most management consulting firms pose nowadays. In fact, the worst part of the whole ordeal was just driving down to D.C. That's roughly five hours from here. Yuck.

In other news, I'm working on a few more writing projects, so now it's become a challenge to see how much writing I can possibly output in one day.

So, let's see where the next few weeks take me, shall we?

unemployment

Unemployment is simply the best.

Since I quit my stupid internship, I've had so much time to reflect on life, build a website, and work on my writing. It's been simply lovely. I also finished reading a book. I love being productive while unemployed.

The chart you see above is my interview history since last year. I'm really quite tired of talking about myself and tired of taking tests and talking to so many people. I wish someone would hire me so I could stop. 

gone

Yep, that's right. I quit for real this time. I refuse to go back to that horrible place where I was verbally and emotionally abused day after day.

fts

I'm not going back after tomorrow.

happiness

This is a chart depicting my current level of happiness. I'm hoping things turn around soon. 

networking my way to the top

Well, DB followed through on his promise to introduce me to some people. Nothing has happened yet, though. I watched as he called up his friend and told him about me and my other co-worker.

Nothing much else has happened in the office lately I'm sad to report. I've been blogging, tweeting, and writing up some market research reports as usual. Luckily I haven't had to make a stupid deck in a while.

i quit

So yesterday, I told my "bosses" that I quit...and they wouldn't have it. I've been telling people that they didn't let me resign, but ultimately it's up to me. I realize I hold the power and that I can just stop showing up at any point. The problem is that I just won't leave on favorable terms.

I can't believe I actually used the words "I would prefer to leave at the end of the week," and they kept pushing me to stay. Like I'm actually that valuable to them? Unlikely. It's not like they're helping me find a full time position.

time

Every day that goes by I lose a little faith in myself. I'm watching as my former classmates return to school for their final semester, full of that same hope I felt last year. People said it would be difficult to find a job, but no one warned me that it would be this hard. I suppose I should have suspected it, given the current economic climate. I'm guilty of hubris, of thinking that it would be easy, that my track record would speak for itself.

the courage to quit

I am a coward.

I can't summon the courage to quit. I don't know what's wrong with me. It's about time I quit this miserable job because I'm no longer learning anything.

I should just leave. Help me leave!

Yesterday I had an informational interview from which I didn't expect much. It was a pretty neat company down in Chelsea; they seemed pretty chill, but I'm just not sure it's for me. If you've seen "Friends with Benefits," it's sort of like that atmosphere that Justin Timberlake was working in pre-GQ. Yes, just like that. Dim lighting, with little globes of light hanging from the ceiling. The elevator was pretty ghetto, and the interior held glass walls, wooden floors, and an open floor plan. Everywhere people were dressed casually, in ripped jeans, crumpled t-shirts. Many of the employees sported large tattoos and piercings.

interviewing while sick

So, if I were smart, I probably would have rescheduled my interview with that ill paying job so that I wouldn't have to go into a meeting while hacking up a storm.

I guess I'm not smart.

Nah, the interview went pretty well considering I was coughing every other minute and my sinuses were seriously congested. All this pressure was building up inside my head. I could barely think straight, but I made it through.

The interview itself wasn't terrible. I wasn't asked that many questions, and I just talked about all of my experiences. If there's one thing that this internship (that I hate) has done for me, it's made me more confident in my abilities. Well, I'm not sure if that's quite it. It's probably that it's made me not care about anything. I'm largely apathetic toward everything in life now. Basically, it's beaten the hope and compassion out of me. I don't care about anything.

job interview X

Last week I had yet another phone interview, and it seemed to go well in spite of my current state of ill health. Yeah, I haven't been sick in nearly a year, and then I caught a cold. I think it's a cold, but it could be something else.

The interviewer told me upfront that the salary wasn't very good. I wonder why she did that. That's never happened to me before. Does that suggest that it's a terrible job?

Why is it that I always find the worst paying jobs?

According to Payscale.com, the median starting salary for economics majors (like myself) for 2010-2011 was $47, 300.

pompousness

It's come to my attention that I sound a little pompous when I write here.

My response: Why yes, yes I am.

You can't get anywhere unless you believe in yourself, right? So I'm just going to keep on being awesome and you can read if you like or stop if you don't. Glad we got that settled.

a promotion

In a truly twisted turn of events, I've been promoted to "Senior Analyst." Yes, that's right. The unpaid internship is rewarding me with more work. Now, I'm in charge of a few of the new analysts and have to help them project manage. The only problem with this is that it's more work and that I have my own projects to work on.

I'm a little pissed off about it because I stated last week that I would be leaving next week, next Friday, in fact. And now they expect me to stay through the end of the month because they're covering my transportation costs. Right, because my labor is so cheap you might as well just pay for my transportation and give me some extra work while you're at it.

happy new year

Happy New Year! With this coming year, I have a few resolutions and hopes that I'll share now. They are in no particular order.

1. Get a job. Preferably one that doesn't make me want to kill myself. That was harsh. I actually mean find one that is fulfilling and pays and that doesn't involve me getting yelled at every day.

2. Find some mancandy. It's only right. Focus on the job first, and then focus on personal life. Come on life, even my younger sister has a boyfriend now. This is totally unfair.

3. Embrace femininity. Whenever I get really depressed, I throw trying to look good out the window. This year, like I said last year, I will try to dress better and figure out how to wear makeup and all that jazz. Right now I'm wearing holey jeans, an old t-shirt, and an Old Navy fleece pullover. Not a great start, but I'm not going anywhere today. Oh crap, this is how it's going to go for the rest of the year isn't it?